Friday, July 28, 2006

Boppin' across Missouri.

Wednesday morning Peat and I moved a couch for my girlfriend's mom. Afterwards we had a beer in the driveway. Peat said "Stepanie and I are going to columbia tonight to see the Ditty Bops show and then im going to ride to St. Louis with them tommorow. You guys want to go?"

Ten minutes later Peat, Cole, Stephanie and I were on our way to Columbia.

We got into Columbia a little later than expected and we're just in time to catch the second half of the Ditty Bops' set. We learned that the ride was leaving at 7:00am the next morning and then had a fucking delicious pizza. We got some beers and Stephanie dropped hers. Then we layed in puddles of our own sweat and waited for it be 6:00am.

6:00am came and was quickly followed by orange juice, eggs, hashed browns, stale bagels and sunblock application. we were on our way.

Some of you already know that Peat, Cole and I are already familiar with the Kaity Trail and we do not exactly have a great relationship. But this time around we fared much better with lighter bikes and MUCH less shit strapped to them.

Abbey and Amanda (The Ditty Bop's) have been riding there bikes from show to show since May. They started in Los Angeles, rode up the coast to San Fran and then accross the entire western part of the US. They aren't Stopping until they reach the East Coast. They are skinny little bad asses!

This the Kaity Trail

The Fucking Bike Club has fun with The Ditty Bops in North Jefferson MO.

Peat caught a toad.
I got stung by a bee.
We rode 80 miles.
We all got sore asses.

Check out for the Ditty Bops' side of the story.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

AUGUST first national night out!

Ok so august 1st is national night out so there should be lots of neighborhood sponsored BBQ's and block parties. The idea is to cruise through neighborhoods we normally don't get to on our rides to try and score free beer and bbq or just go for a bike ride. Goggle said the hipoint opens at 4pm so well leave from the hipoint at 6:30pm this should be a slow ride so weird bikes are encouraged.

also this friday at camp on Cherokee There gonna show a movie about bike messengers should be good its after critical mass which i know nothing about.


Calling all FBCer's.
redbull is putting on a soapbox derby in St. Louis October 28th! We need to make an FBC car and win. The application is due august 28h. check out for details. If you want in on the team and have an idea for a car that would be fast and totally rad let me know.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Why Can't It Be a Full Moon Every Night?

A Summer Time Underwear Pool Party really was a matter of desinty for The Fucking Bike Club. We set a new attendance record, at least 75 people, probably more. We looked fantastic in out underwear. We ate delicious donuts. We met Brian's Mom and she hosed us down. We Jumped a fence, did cannonballs and made the greatest whirlpool some apartment complex in Shrewsberry has ever seen. We rode 22 miles with 2X4's, quart cans and 40's. We saw Peats ass and Meister's junk. One FBCer rode naked... IN WEBSTER GROVES! Du-rag drove from three and a half hours from Springfield, MO on ten minutes notice. Sean broke the hearts of a couple of Southside girls in a Fast and Furious Honda Accord. We jumped a fence, jumped it back, saw the fuzz and rode right past them.

Three Cheers for Saddlebags Brian for the route idea and destinations. If anyone else has any bright ideas for a Fiasco, or a race, or any FBC event, or is interested in posting on the website please let us know.

The Fucking Bike Club will never die!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

The files are in the computer?

Because im an idiot, the posts about The Fucking Bike Club Slow Ride to Fast Eddie's, are in reverse order. Scroll down for the first post and then make your way back up.

The F.B.C. is F.U.N. (re-continued once again)

Some people slept in tents. Some people slept inside. I slept on a queen sized matress in backyard. Early in the morning it rained. Then John and i slept together on a queen sized mattress in the garage.

Around 11:00 we woke up and met Stinkerbell. She is Kirsten's very cute daughter. John Patterson, The Eagle Scout, taught Stinker how to safely use a pocket knife.

Our host bid us farewell and the final seven of us pedaled our way back towards the arch. We had a great many more adventures.

I finally made it home around 11:00 Sunday night. What an amazing weekend.

The F.B.C. is F.U.N. (re-continued again)

After having our fill of salty meats, ICE COLD beers, dancing, shouting, screaming WINE-COLA!, watching John hit on older women, teaching the bartenders about King Deweys, making friends, getting wierd looks, eating more and being totally awesome, we remounted our rigs and made our way to Scott and Kirsten's house in Wood river.

On the way to Wood River, Andy and John got seperated from the rest of the crew. They stumbled their way into a thong underwear contest at a local bar. They did not participate. They did however see many people participating. Upon leaving the thong contest John got a flat tire. His tire was puntured by a nail. The nail was so large that it hit the frame of his bike when his wheel rolled.

In the meantime, those of us that made it to Scott and Kirsten's house procurred more beer. We also procurred Red Wine and Coke. We bought bags of ice. We made WINE-COLA!.

The Fucking Bike Club had fun.

The F.B.C. is F.U.N (re-continued)

Farther down the Riverfront Trail Scott gets his third flat tire. This occurs right along side a pumping station. An intrepid few FBCers cross the bridge to the pumping station to explore. They discover a retarded beaver. Everyone else joins them to investigate. John says "somebody grab a basketball. I know where a retarded beaver lives." Saddlebags and i decided this is one of the funniest things we have ever heard. Peat climbs down a ricketey 30 foot ladder. he finds a long stick and pokes the retarded beaver. The beaver (according to Peat) makes a noise.

We make foreward progress on the Riverfront Trail. At a break neck pace make it the 11 miles to the Old Chain of Rocks Bridge and their beautiful rest area with three porto-johns. This is the whole gang except for myself (behind camera) and Chris (probably vomiting some where). Some nerdy recreational cyclist couple joins us at the rest area. The man immeadiately is interested in Cole's track bike and asks about it. His wife asks if it has brakes. Cole responds that it does not. The wife asks who rides in front of him and then laughs at her own joke. We all laugh inappropriatly loudly.

A quick stop at the world renowned Anal Motel.

Scott has two more flat tires before we finally reach Fast Eddie's. The crew is already drunk on the nectar of a job well done... and Sparks Black.

The Fucking Bike Club eats.

The Fucking Bike Club drinks.

The Fucking Bike Club is merry.

The F.B.C is F.U.N (continued)

I going to start this out with a disclaimer:

The Fucking Bike Club is bigger than words.

No words could possible convey the amount pure joy that was experienced on one of the greatest adventures of my life. As fun as this ride may look to those of that didnt experience it, just multiply that by awesome-finity and then try to imagine something twice as fun as that.

Noon at the Hi-Pointe. Chris Moesby visits the vomitorium. Scott's tire eagerly awaits its first flat tire of the day (while lying untouched on the sidewalk). Peat is not left behind thanks to Scott's flat tire.

On the road, kind of. We make it all the way to the Schnucks on Lindell before making our first much needed rest stop. Brian, a.k.a Saddlebags, gives me a dashing chest piece. I think it makes me look quite handsome. FBCers buy beer and sandwiches and apply sunblock.

we make our way down town to the riverfront trail where Andy and John once found a dismembered human carcass stuffed into a well. Our crew checks out the where the dismembered human carcass was found. It is no longer there.

Scott's second flat tire. The crew enjoys the down time to hamm it up for the camera and read some poem or something written on the flood wall. Billy spits water through his teeth. I tell everybody already for the 10th or 11th time how proud i am of them and what a great day it is.

Monday, July 10, 2006

greetings from AZ.

i am watching you.

ps. buy the fucking koozies from sandbox.

The F.B.C is F.U.N

I need a little time to recover before attempting a full recap of the greatest weekend of our lives. I hope this photo will tide you over.

Full Moon Fiaso 15 Underwear/Swimwear Goodtimes Summer Pool Party of Destiny leaves the Hi-Pointe Tuesday night (July 11) at 11:00pm. Be there and be awesome.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Koozie update

I hope fast eddie's was a blast, plenty of beer, food and no more flats after leaving the hi-pointe lot for all of those that could go.
Anyway, I've sold almost no koozies and I'd rather not have a box of them in a corner of my apartment. plus everyone deserves to drink a cold beverage. so from now on they are free, but donations are highly appreciated. Limit one free koozie per person so that there is enough to go around (donate and you can get more). Next time you see me just holler "hey you with the koozies! give me one of those fucking bike club koozies!"
btw what's the proper term for these. I picked up koozie while shopping for these, but I've heard coolie or something like that and other terms too
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