Monday, November 26, 2007

No Matter What

At nine o'clock on Saturday night I was feeling less than gung-ho about the idea of going for a bike ride. My head still hurt from Friday night. I didn't have a Russian fur hat. It was cold outside and I was grumpy.

But grumpy or not only a world-class shit for brains would intentionally miss a Fiasco without a good reason. So I zipped the fake fur liner out of my dads overcoat, put some beer in a back pack, pulled on my ski mask and pedaled into the brisk night air.
Fun cures all.

This is the hat that I wish I was wearing on Saturday. The unnamed lifetime member for life in this photo makes the hat look pretty damn good. I think I could make make it look positively out of this world.

Our route took 65 FBCers into hinterlands that are inner ring St. Louis County and ultimately to the top of the ever formidable Deer Creek sledding hill. Participation in the 10-speed gravity race and fixed gear slow race down the steep, damp, sewer-lidded, grass hill was disappointingly lackluster. But, despite the fact that only about 15 adventurous racers faced the hill on two wheels, there was plenty of excitement. The beaver crashed so hard it knocked his construction paper buck teeth right out.

Who knew the dude from that movie 'Tron' was in the Fucking Bike Club? And, for Christ's sake, why is he walking down the hill? It's kind of embarrassing.

When everyone made it to the bottom of the hill, regardless of whether they got down the awesome way, or the old lady way, we headed to Cousin Hugo's Ski Lodge just on the other side of the creek.

The Full Moon Fiasco has touched down at Cousin Hugo's before. Last time we were there, the bartender gave us a free bottle of green Pucker. We gave him a spoke card. They've still got it. I offer this as photographic proof.

I think everyone knows by now, that after the first stop, all bets are off. Fiasco #32 was no exception. Different groups went different places. The group I was in looped the shit out of some loops on the way to Foley's which I now know is in fact not a 3 o'clock bar. Then we went to Cusamano's which I now know is in fact not a cool place to go. Another interesting fact about Cusamano's is that a bottle of Busch beer cost $4, but you can get one sip for free if you are John Patterson.

Hey Adrian, nice ship!


Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Full Beaver Moon

Full Moon Fiasco #32 is this Saturday, November 24th.

According to those farmers with the almanac, this is the full beaver moon. What that means, I don't know. But lets have some fun with it. If you have a beaver outfit for gods sake wear it, if you don't or its at the dry cleaners, wear some thrift store fur. I'm going to try and find one of those russian fur hats, like the ones my friend Bob Sacamento sells.

Meet at Turtle Park at 10pm. Ride is at 11pm sharp.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

The New Rule.

Its been a busy couple of weeks for the FBC.
We rode bicycles. We had beers. We hung out in graveyards and donut shop parking lots with burly men dressed as Hooters girls. We danced in Mosby and Billy's dinning room. We grilled sausages. We tested the passenger capacity on the Frankenshoppingscooter. We wore halloween costumes. We reserved a 75 person pavilion in the park with beer permit for $50. We raced. We almost puked. We were freezing when the sun went down. We welcomed new lifetime members for life. We took a few photos. We made up a new rule: ALL FBC RELATED SHIT-TALKING MUST BE DONE IN PERSON.





Monday, November 05, 2007

Hold Your Horses

Updates forthcomming for:
Full Moon Fiasco #31
FBC Bike Show
Ryan's Reschedualed Alley Cat Race

But don't hold your breathe. Unless you can hold your breathe for a week, in which case, hold it. See if I care.

Saturday, November 03, 2007

Sunday Race Day.

Sunday November 4th: Ryan's Reschedualed Alley Cat Race. Meet by the fountain in Tower Grove Park at 3pm for registration. Race starts at 4pm. Be There, yes you.

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