Monday, June 08, 2009

An Open Letter To All Lifetime Members For Life

I’ll start this by saying that I love the FBC. I do. My first ride was 10/06 and I’ve been riding when I can ever since. I just wanted to say that last night was the first time that I’ve gone home from an FBC full moon fiasco without the feeling of being a part of something great due to the actions of several folks. Please let me make it clear that the organizers do a phenomenal job of keeping things loose and letting the group police themselves. I understand that when you get THAT many people together there are bound to be a couple of jerks – hey it takes all kinds! – but that tribe appears to be growing in number and when their actions jeopardize the fun, safety, and potentially the future of the group I think something needs to be said.

FBC has grown to be massive. Huge. But we aren’t the only people on the road and in the interest of keeping the peace between motorists and cyclists (FBC or otherwise) shouldn’t act like it. Although many people were reminded over and over (and over) again to stay in one lane, I watched as cars would creep along trying to pass the group and riders would just stay dead center in the left lane as if there wasn’t a car there at all. MO state law says a group of cyclists can legally take A lane. One lane. The one on the right. It’s pretty generous of them and not that hard to do on our part.

Overheard: “I actually like pissing cars off.” Wow. Wrong attitude. You are a jerk. Take it somewhere else.

When we get to a landing spot PLEASE pick up your trash. I watched a guy set his beer can on the ground, stomp on it and walk away from it. *boggle* Please have some respect not only for our fine city, but for the people that don’t want to see the FBC get a bad wrap for stuff like that and take the time to pick up after you. A couple of kind souls took the time to clean up your mess.

That’s not to say everyone sucks. It is still awesome and uplifting to see the majority of folks help out with a flat, warn about potholes, grates and traffic, and generally look out for each other (which reminds me: I really hope the fellow that bonked his head after the parked-car crash is alright). It’s that consideration and brother/sisterhood that makes the FBC great, something to keep coming back to and something to be proud to be a part of.

Please just practice Common Sense and Common Courtesy. Remember that we are all in this together together; geared, fixed, single speed, on foot or motorized. Your actions help shape the way that St. Louisans view cyclists of all kinds so please do your part to keep it friendly and safe. Take care of one another, be respectful, HAVE FUN and let’s have another 51 great full moon fiascos.

-Lifetime Member


Blogger Althotas said...

I was having too much fun to notice any of these things, but if there needs to be some rules, then there should be some rules. After all, the FBC rules!

I say the first rule should be: Follow the rules.

June 08, 2009 10:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well said my friend, well said...

June 09, 2009 6:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

well the one lane thing is not only common sense, but good sense. remember the fbc is normally sharing the road with late night half drunk drivers. so staying out of the left lane isn't just for the car's benefit.

as far as trash, yeah sometimes it's a problem when there are no trash cans like the riverfront park which is a little silly on the city's part. in defense of most of the fbc riders though, when i get back to turtle park late night where there are trash cans, the trash is always in or at least stacked next to the trash can if it's full. and i will say 95% of our trash is aluminum cans which almost always get picked up by someone, esp. if we at least get them into a pile or bag.

but it's no excuse to be lazy, and we really should set the example. i am gonna add a couple extra large trash bags to my gear bag just for times when there are no trash cans. if you bring bottles though, be prepared for some hefty abuse if you want me to carry them out for you. :)

so to summarize:

stay the fuck out of the left lane.
(verbally abusing dickheads that are out there will probably work)

pick up your fucking trash.
(a couple people with trash bags will solve this issue easily)

June 09, 2009 9:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We should adopt a stretch of highway as long as the city agrees to shut it down one night a year for a huge ass party. I would love to see the sign that says adopted by the fucking bike club next to the road.

June 09, 2009 10:22 AM  
Blogger Lolololori said...

FBC stays classy!

June 09, 2009 11:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The irony of a bike club adopting a stretch of highway is mind-boggling. We should do it, if not just to get the word ''fucking' on a street sign.

To the writer of the letter...well done. Long live FBC! See yall Flag Day!

June 09, 2009 1:54 PM  
Blogger Paul said...

hooray for common sense and common courtesy. thanks for writing that.

on another note, here are some pics from turtle 2 turtle. they are mainly from the soda stop (aka river front trail love shack) and turtle park 2.

June 09, 2009 3:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Holla! It isn't fun to keep nagging, like, the ENTIRE time to keep fools safe! NO fun. Also, I've heard claims before that the FBC is a "boy's club" for a variety of pretty stupid reasons... However, girls need to pee sometimes, and in places ideally NOT covered with poisen ivy and bugs. Maybe a gas-station ride-by next time? Many thanks!
Love Love Love

June 09, 2009 5:38 PM  
Blogger 80's Are Back! said...

Hey Jenn, be careful peeing around poison ivy, and tick infested knolls! You wouldn't wanna end up with a rash that's scabby from constant scratching. ( A condition known as "massacre at the Y")

Stop taking these risks, and embrace your gender handicap!

You go girl!

June 09, 2009 6:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"A life without adventure is likely to be unsatisfying, but a life in which adventure is allowed to take whatever form it will is sure to be short."

-Bertrand Russell

please take some time to learn how to safely ride a bicycle before you ruin the FBC for everyone.

June 09, 2009 7:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

make sure your tires have air in them before you ride to south broadway. its a long walk home when you're drunk and lost at 2 am.

June 09, 2009 10:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i found a pretty nice zippo lighter at the riverfront park. i'll throw it in my bag and bring it to the next fbc event (flag day)? or even in july. it'd be sad that a non smoker found and inherited it. the only thing i'd use it for is to burn up some random shit, not that i would burn up some random shit, but with a nice lighter like this i might feel compelled to.........

giant tire don

June 10, 2009 4:50 AM  
Blogger anchovy said...

This is a link to the bike polo info if anybody didnt get a flier and wants to know more about it.

June 10, 2009 6:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

bandwagon comment about agreeing with the letter!

June 11, 2009 9:17 AM  
Anonymous FBC Surgeon For Life said...

Lifetime member,

First let me say MegaDittos (c)!!! You are so right about the need for more rules on the full moon Fiasco.

Also MegaDittos (c) Anonymous-female about privacy appropriate potty breaks with gender inclusiveness. And airing up tires !!! So true :) Anonymous-male?

I just hate it when a biker breaks a traffic law - don't they know they're just ruining it for all of us?

As a lifetime member for life since August 2005, I have been quietly suffering as we broke traffic laws, alcohol laws, ettiquette standards, and Miss Manners guidelines. And the foul language - don't get me started.

I think it would serve us all well to respect cars and laws more. Especially any and all lifetime members for life who have thrown shit at cars, chased cars and yelled at them, kicked the windows of rude drivers, or been involved in fisticuffs with rude drivers.

I know we'd all feel better about our selves riding home if we rode on the sidewalks, with helmets, sober, and neutered

I'll be offering free cocksectomys at the next ride

June 11, 2009 7:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Surgeon - I don't see anything about the need for more rules, just a request to not be a douchebag. Ahem. I am interested in a cocksectomy though.

June 12, 2009 9:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As I recall, one of the original and still standing rules of FBC lifetime membership is to not be an asshole. So we've got that covered. Which is nice.

June 12, 2009 1:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I definitely remember stepping on a can and leaving it there. That doesn't even make sense to me considering I picked up a few of not my cans at the park before we bounced. Sorry for littering. Otherwise, the ride was the shit.

June 12, 2009 1:34 PM  
Anonymous Your pissed off daddy said... is the "airing of the grievances" and it isn't even Festivus!!!

My 2 cents (only if you take debit...otherwise I am going for a quarter's worth of venom)

How about when we are riding through residential areas & neighborhoods everyone shut their pieholes in regards to the idiotic screaming? Yelling underneath a bridge or overpass is about as exciting as diddling a dumb sorority chick, you only do it while drinking and if you have half a brain you should feel stupid about it the day after. One more "school" chant breaks out and I am going to 'chant' my foot up your asses!

Also, hey dumbfuck underage kids that are proudly displaying your adult about some discretion? A coozie? Booze filled water bottle? It'd be good for you AND for the group.

One lane all the time, no excuses. Catch you out in the passing lane again and if a car doesn't run you over I just might.

And for the FBC surgeon and his "cocksectomys" time don't bite so hard!

June 12, 2009 2:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds like it's time for a split...Outlaw FBC!

June 12, 2009 3:04 PM  
Blogger allupinyermoms said...

This club is crap, Fucking Bike Cowards is a more fitting name.... between my rides and reading the posts here, it is a joke. Whatever I can do to destroy you all is my #1 priority, if that means drinkin a handle, stealin a car and plowin down a bunch of you on the Flag day ride then so be it, may the streets fill with your blood and mangled spokes or cancel the event to avoid this... either way, don't bring a bike to a car fight...cheers

June 13, 2009 10:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Flag Day? 6:30?

June 14, 2009 1:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

we have officially canceled the FBC, there will no longer be any FBC events, start your own bike club.

June 14, 2009 2:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

flag day ride? sandrinas is having a flag day luau with proceeds going to kdhx.

June 14, 2009 2:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

man douche baggery must be that guys occupation.

June 14, 2009 3:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

more puppies!

June 17, 2009 7:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

less puppies!

June 17, 2009 2:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

an agreeable number agreed upon by everyone number of puppies!

June 17, 2009 2:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

actually that guy is a cook, but douche baggery was his major in college.

June 17, 2009 3:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

After looking through past events posted on this blog, I have one question: When is the next "Jim Utz's Big-Huge-Giant-Epic-All-Night Adventure?" It looks like a helluva good time.

June 18, 2009 4:08 PM  
Blogger Kevin said...

hey mr. awesome-

check your sub page in june i as just left you an awesome comment/proposal.

June 19, 2009 9:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The FBC is a grand institution. I'd hate to see cops and assholes mess up my fun.

June 19, 2009 1:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

kevin and mr. awesome sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g

June 19, 2009 3:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

FBC need to expnad accross the Boarders i.e. Eugene OR. Affiliate branch of brand new adventures and debauchery?

July 01, 2009 10:17 PM  
Blogger sos said...

allupinyermoms - i'll bring a car to the car fight. name a time and place. my car has a bigger dick and craps bigger than yours.

July 02, 2009 9:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i've got a monster truck for your car fight....and it's got a bike rack. don't fuck with the FBC, we own the bank that owns the loan on your car.
re: FBC in Eugene - that's like the FBC of Columbia. Funny fun joke but why bother? who needs an excuse to drink and ride in a college town? PDX, ok...

July 02, 2009 8:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Since the FBC is largely an booze-fueled group, and it's also true that booze turns a lot people into assholes... some bad behavior is just inevitable.

July 06, 2009 11:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

True, but people who become an asshole when drunk become apologetic, which was likely not the case with the shit disturbers. The FBC is the Friendly Bike Club, and thus, as a corallary, is the Friendly Drunk Bike Club.

Let's have a wonderous fiasco 52 shall we?

July 06, 2009 11:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

anyone who comments on this blog is a fag.

July 06, 2009 2:29 PM  
Blogger roseblablabland said...

yea!!! im a FAG!!!

July 06, 2009 3:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I completely agree with the previous letter

but to the person who said we should wear helmets and ride on the sidewalk
why don't we make it even safer by wearing pillows and bubble wrap.

July 10, 2009 8:34 PM  
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